4 rounds down, 4 to go

I'm so happy to say...I am 50% done with chemotherapy! Actually, I am completely done with two of the chemo meds (I had four rounds of Adriamycin and Cytoxin--COMPLETED!!! YEA!!!).  The next four rounds will be a chemo called Taxotier.  The doctor said the side effects from Taxotier are not as bad as side effects from the two that I have been getting.  I'm holding him at his word on that!  I will also be getting the Herceptin infusion simultaneously with the Taxotier, but Herceptin will be weekly.  From what I understand, there are no side effects from Herceptin.  Praise God for "no side effects"!  Praise God also for the Neupagen shots that I get daily--my white count has stayed at the high end of normal throughout treatment so far.  This keeps me from being at high risk for contracting infection.

Thank you for your prayers.  God is so faithful!  I saw the doctor on Friday before chemo, and he gave me good news that he can no longer feel the lumps at all--which means the chemo is doing its job and shrinking the tumors.  Also, the skin redness is gone...which means...either it is IBC (Inflammatory Breast Cancer) and the chemo is working, or it is not IBC and the redness is just disappearing.  We don't want it to be IBC, and tests have been inconclusive, but as I have said in previous posts, it has to be treated as if it is IBC.   No matter what, God is the Great Physician and He is in control!  He is healing my body.  

If I trust that God is in control, why am I so weak?  I know He will heal me, and I know that He works all things together for the good of those who love him.  I definitely love Him!  But when I don't feel good, I have a hard time trusting that promise.  With this round of chemo, I didn't get sick Friday night.  In fact I felt good.  Saturday I felt so good that we went to a movie.  Ugh...Sunday it hit!  I was pretty miserable Sunday and most of Monday.  It is in those times that I  call out to God and ask to feel His arms around me...I feel scared, although I believe that God is teaching me what He wants me to know.   I have so much to learn about faith and patience.  The Bible says in James 1:2-4, "My brethren, count it all joy when you fall into various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces patience.  But let patience have its perfect work, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking nothing."  Okay God, I failed the test this time; however, this test did produce patience.  I waited patiently (well, sort of patiently) for the flu like symptoms to go away.  I slept away most of the two days. By Monday evening, I started to feel better.  My husband hauled me out of the house to take a walk around the block last night.  The air was fresh, the sky was beautiful, the exercise got my blood flowing.  Today, I woke up to a beautiful new day, the sun is shining and I feel good.  I even feel good enough to have my coffee--that is a good thing! :)

God, thank you for tests and trials. Thank you for your faithfulness even when I am not. Father, please help me be teachable, grow in faith, and draw on the strength of Jesus Christ, Your Son, my Lord.

Thank you to Terri, Tamie, Heidi, Ann, and Jolene for bringing meals to my home.  Thank you Pat, Amy, Shaela, and Veronica for my dill pickles (yes...that's a chemo craving)!!!!  Thank you Tami for taking me for my chemo appointments and staying with me to help me through those rough days.  Thank you to all my kids and grandkids for being there for me.  Thank you to my amazing faithful friends.  Thank you to my husband for keeping a sense of humor, for loving me through this, and for making me go out for walks.

In the Power of Christ,
Jane

Prayed up and ready to go to battle, Round 4!

Come on chemo--let's do this!  Going in for round 4 today.  As I pray, I know that I am standing in prayer with hundreds of my friends and fellow prayer warriors.  ...God, today I THANK you in advance for your Almighty Power-- that you will have the chemo medication go into my body and do the job that YOU want it to do.  That it will kill the cancer cells and not harm any other part of my body.  God, you are the Great Physician! Lord, you are in control!  God, please let your light shine through me and bless those that I come into contact with today.  Amen.

3 rounds down, 5 to go

Chemo treatment is 3/8 of the way done...that is 37.5%...but who's counting:)  While the last treatment (March 30) wasn't terrible, it did seem to knock me down a little bit for a longer period of time.  It is hard to describe how it feels.  The only thing I can compare the physical aftereffects of chemo to is the way a woman feels during the first trimester of pregnancy.  I described it that way to a male friend, and he just couldn't relate...sorry:)  For those of you who haven't experienced pregnancy, the best way I can describe it is that you just feel "kinda yukky".  The chemo education nurse explained to me that my body will probably react to chemo the way it reacted to pregnancy, and I have found that to be very true.  I have never vomited from chemo, just as I never vomited from pregnancy. As I did with pregnancy I just feel queezy for a few days following treatment.  During those days, my body feels tired, sluggish, and unmotivated.  My husband gives me one day after treatment to give into that sluggishness before he makes me get up and go outside and walk.  I know exercise is important, but it is hard to get motivated when you feel sluggish and queezy.  My daughter says, "Mom, you need to get out in the fresh air".  They are so right!

So many of you have encouraged me through this journey.  My prayer is that we can encourage one another as we go through storms in our lives.  I have been through storms before, and I am definitely going through one right now.  The biggest blessing in my life is that through the storms, I know where to find hope and peace.  Some days are easier than others, and that is why we need each other to lock arms daily and plunge into the comfort that we can only receive from our Lord and Savior.

This season of my life is one of rest and opportunity for growing closer than I ever imagined to Jesus.  Sometimes He takes us as "captive audience" when He wants to speak to us and do something major in our lives. I am NOT saying that God gave me cancer.  I don't know where the cancer came from...possibly environmental, possibly genetic, possibly stress.  Pain and illness are not from God, but He will certainly use those times in our lives for GOOD beyond our wildest imagination.  He knew I would go through this, and He is allowing me to feel His arms tight around me the entire time.  His Word tells me to be strong and courageous, that He will never fail or forsake me.  His Word says, "Be still and know that I am God", Psalm 46:10.  He will heal my body, and in the meanwhile He will shape me and mold me into who He wants me to be.

During these days before Easter (Resurrection Sunday), I am reminded of the suffering that Jesus went through as He went to the cross to be the sacrifice for the sins of humanity--for my sin, for your sin.  As He prayed the night before His death, He said, "O My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from Me; nevertheless, not as I will but as You will."  Jesus Himself didn't want to go through physical suffering, but He was in complete submission to the Will of God. My discomfort with my illness is nothing compared to the suffering Jesus went through.  Am I willing to drink from the cup of suffering so that the greater Will of God will be accomplished.  You bet!   Jesus rose from the dead and now lives and gives us eternal life as well.  I am excited about the transformation He is making in my life as He brings me through this storm.  I know His Will is perfect, so I can't wait to see how He will use me.

I pray that you have a wonderful Easter Sunday remembering that it is the day that our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ rose from the dead.  God bless you!